Text 6 Apr

Just to let people know the funeral will be held on friday 5th April at 10.30am in Westbourne Presbyterian Church on the Newtownards Road, Belfast.

Everyone is more than welcome

Text 2 Apr



It seems i am to be a kept man in the short term at least.

My ankle shows no sign of healing in fact its getting worse if i am honest, i may have to give in and go to A+E and get it checked out.

So Mrs.belfasttaxi has stepped into the breach and is going back to work (bills need payed), something she is very nervious about but God love her she is doing it anyway.

I on the other hand am stuck on the sofa unable to move without much F-ing and jeffing and maybe a…

Text 1 Apr

I have been toying with the idea of a new Satnav for the last few weeks, mine still works fine but i am a sucker for new technology.

If it flashes and goes beep im you man.

I am tempted to wait a little while as in about another six to twelve months garmin are bringing out a new heads up display model.


I so so want one, all i have to do is convince she who must be obeyed!


Text 31 Mar


A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood.

She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.

“Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?”

The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?”

The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage.

The man’s wife, inside the house,…

Text 30 Mar

Ok she may of grown a wee bit since this photo

We have had our pup ruby about 8 months now and from time to time we take her to see her litter mate who are owned by my cousin.

I couldn’t go because of my ankle playing up so she took a few videos for me.

This is ruby when she arrived at the park messing about in the woods waiting on the other pups arriving



Ruby had a bit of a run about and was her normal pain in the butt self


Text 25 Mar

I have finally given in and decided to start an exercise routine as my doctor has been asking me to do.

Rather than slogging off to the gym after a hard days driving, i though things would work out better with a solid piece of home exercise equipment.

Thankfully i found a piece of kit that suits me and was cheap to buy.

Check it out and let me know what you think.



Text 24 Mar


I dread the budget when it comes round every year mostly due to them increasing fuel duty.

Thankfully the Chancellor has stopped the automatic rise in duty that was due next week (inflation plus 1 penny on a litre = 6 pence this time round) that would have seen the price for a gallon of diesel go up to £5.90 in fact he even dropped duty by a penny a litre.

At the minute 60 odd percent of the cost of a gallon of diesel is tax meaning that roughly £3.54 out of £5.90 is…

Text 7 Mar



Do you want to know the worst part of working night shift?

Its just after i get out of my car for the first time in 12 hours.

Why?

Well to answer you simply all the muscles in my legs and back have seized and they are not best chuffed at being asked to carry hulking mass into the house never mind up the stairs.

Or to put it another way i hate walking like a zombie with a case of the dribbly shits who didn’t make it to the loo in time!



I am only thankful that in the wee small hours there is no one about to laugh at me.

Text 6 Mar



Whenever your kids are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God had a little trouble with kids.

After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And the first thing he said was, “Don’t.”

“Don’t what?” Adam replied.

“Don’t eat the forbidden fruit,” God said.

“Forbidden fruit? We got forbidden fruit? Hey, Eve…we got forbidden fruit!”

“No way!”

“Way!”

“Don’t eat that fruit!” said God.

“Why?”

“Because I am your Father and I…

Text 4 Mar


In the world of relationships, one single rule applies:
Make the woman happy.
Do something she likes, and you get points.
Do something she dislikes, and points are subtracted.

You don’t get any points for doing something she expects…Sorry, that’s the way it is.

Here’s a guide to the point system.

Simple Duties:

You make the bed (+1)
You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pillows (0)

You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets(-1)


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